X Factor Week 2 The X Factor UK Verdienst (Einnahmen)
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And not remotely Motown. Four Of Diamonds. Well, it would've been mean to get rid of them so soon.
Although try telling that to Bratavio. Find out who's in the bottom 3 after the break. F reddy Parker is bookies' fave to be voted off the show tonight, but if he does have to sing for survival, it could be tricky, since he's been put on voice rest.
The good news is, Freddy can play the piano, so perhaps he'll do an instrumental number. Children by Robert Miles could be a winner.
Or he could go really retro and pull some Tubular Bells out of the bag. In other news, OneRepublic just sang a song, but results show promo performances always feel like hold music.
It doesn't work! In the meantime, we've got performances from Little Mix and OneRepublic to endure enjoy, plus more recaps than you can shake a quivery hungover hand at.
Not that any of the judges have hangovers today. Because they definitely, definitely weren't drunk last night. That would be an outrageous allegation for a family show.
W e hope not. This year's X Factor contestants might be run of the mill, but it's all been going off on the judging panel.
Awkward coincidence or handy publicity for all concerned? You decide. It looked like quite the party. The evening could go badly for Saara Aalto too.
The Finnish singer narrowly escaped the chop last week, when the judges opted to send gruesome twosome Bratavio home instead, and seems to be struggling to connect with the audience, despite having an undeniably powerful voice.
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To watch The Telegraph's latest video content please visit youtube. Now it's time for the judges to decide what's what.
Oh, also, this happened:. S afe so far tonight include: Emily Middlemas. We like her, even though she was distinctly average last night. Gifty Louise.
He's only dressed like , which is a terrible letdown. And he's singing some old Alicia Keys thing. Although 'singing' is a strong word - he's sort of huffing all the words like he's just been chased up a hill by a tiger.
And he's being drowned out by the backing vocals. And he spent the last 15 seconds of the song just wailing aimlessly.
I think Paije might be in trouble here. This week the arbitrary level of tension comes from Harry getting a little bit nervous during rehearsals, bless him.
Really, though? One Direction really think that Kelly Clarkson is their musical hero? All of them? Look at them - judging by their haircuts, their heroes are Justin Bieber and Pete Beale from EastEnders and nobody else.
When they finish, Cheryl conspiculously pulls an "awww" face at them. Then, when she has to judge them, she gets all like "Orrr, ah wonna ganna put yers all in me pocket, like.
Simon calls them "the most exciting pop band in the country today". Simon is 51 years old. Full marks. Also, please can you all stop being funnier than me.
It's extremely annoying. Hopefully one of them will be at least partially listenable this time. Here's hoping. More to come, once I've taped my ears back on.
After all, Cher's part of this new generation of popstar that Simon Cowell's always banging on about. You can tell this by the way she's appearing on a TV show masterminded by a year-old man, and singing a song by a multi-millionaire businessman that was released before she even went to school and heavily samples a song from a musical about an year-old newspaper cartoon character.
She's well nang, innit. I'm not sure if that's true or not because I keep falling asleep. I can just about make out a figure onscreen, but I can't tell who it is because he hasn't got any charisma or memorable features to speak of.
I think he's singing something, but I can only hear a listlessly tinkling piano and a sort of nondescript droning noise. If anyone needs me I'll be having a nap.
But only because I have a vague recollection of it even happening. That's a step up, isn't it? Actually, no, it's gone again.
Sorry John. Between that, and all the men dancing around in their pants, and the way that the only words in this song are "Ooohwooo oooohwooooh", and the Louis Walsh namecheck, I honestly don't know what to make of this at all.
However, Simon Cowell keeps saying he likes 'fun' acts this year. That's hobbled his critique of Wagner, hasn't it? Not a chance, Rebecca.
It's actually quite good. Poised, powerful, in control Now, fingers crossed that Rebecca doesn't bugger up the illusion by talking in her normal voice at the end.
He's singing a John Lennon song. At this point it sounds like it might be Jealous Guy, but it could also be an unreleased B-side where Lennon threw some cats into a cement mixer if the rehearsal footage is any indication.
With, and I'm not sure if this is deliberate, a giant bullet-hole as a backdrop. Nice one, X Factor. I don't know. It's certainly very intense again.
It didn't make me want to check the locks on my front door in a paranoid sweat as much as last week's performance did, though, so that's something.
I assume that's a compliment. I think I have just become physically aroused. Maybe from now on Wagner will only sing songs by people who he looks like, so next week it'll be a number from Bill Bailey's stand-up set, then the theme-tune to The Wrestler, and then some sort of viking folk song.
This is nothing sort of majestic, though. Those aren't dancers, they're just people who fell under Wagner's spell as he went about his daily business this week.
I want this song to be the new national anthem. I want Wagner to be stuck on top of the fourth plinth at Trafalgar Square forever, surrounded by all those women who keep molesting themselves.
I am physically and emotionally exhausted. I don't know how I'll be able to cope. But poor Katie, though, having to follow such a leathery sexbeast.
That's why she did so badly last week - because she performed a song from her first audition. That and because she's awful.
But anyway, this week Katie has decided to sing a song by Etta James who, oh, Katie also covered in her first audition.
Honestly, what a catastrophic numpty. But, brace yourselves, this performance isn't bad. She's actually singing it rather well. And she's wearing beads around her neck, instead of in her hair or on her wrists, for the first time since we met her.
This is a big improvement. Apparently Sophie is a fan of the pronounced dichotomy that separated Ray Davies's baroque lyrical capabilities from his brother Dave's often blunt guitar playing, and Esther appreciates that the internal friction between the two siblings set them apart from their s counterparts.
But let's all keep them in the competition for a few more weeks anyway, because they're set to self-destruct in a blaze of furious nylon and eyeliner any minute now.
And that's just going to be awesome to watch. God, I wish I were her. But, hey, while she's busy screaming for her life like a trapped miner, let's try and work out how Simon Cowell plans to undermine her popularity this week.
The old 'You're simply not a recording artist' line? Attacking the song choice? Announcing that the theme for next week's X Factor theme is Subtle Understatement?
He must have something good up his sleeve. Again, that's 'shouting'. Simon says that he likes Mary. I see. Playing the long game are we, Simon?
In his intro, Matt reveals his love for Nirvana. I don't know why he bothered - that was pretty evident from his rendition last week of that song by her out of Destiny's Child, wasn't it?
Oh, and also he's singing a note that only Mariah Carey and professional dolphins can reach. As for his song, it's the usual kind of high-pitched yearning we've come to expect from him.
Was it good? Like you, I've just had to process two and a half hours of this nonsense. Let's give it a solid seven out of ten. Another double eviction tomorrow night, so who'll go?
My money's on either Paije, John or Storm. As ever I'll be back here tomorrow night for the results show, where we can sit around twiddling our thumbs for 57 minutes and then act all indignant because the judges have saved Katie again.
In the meantime, I'd welcome your thoughts and theories and hints and pictures of shrines you've constructed to Wagner over on Twitter I'm stuheritage, by the way.
Thanks again for keeping me company. That's mental. Well, here we are again. It's been 24 hours since X Factor treated us to Storm on a motorbike, Cher on a plinth and the disturbing yet undeniably sexy mental image of Wagner on Mary, and now it's time for the fallout.
We've got a minute results show to wade through tonight which, in true X Factor style, will be made up of two musical numbers, four interminable recaps, about eight million adverts and a remaining 30 seconds where two acts will be eliminated as a total afterthought.
So who's for the chop? Aiden probably made the most strangulated caterwaul last night, but Storm had to fill the dreaded opening slot and everyone still thinks that Katie is an awful wazzock.
So it's anyone's guess, frankly. So get discussing, and I'll sporadically pop up to offer some inane observations over the next hour or so.
Let's go. And what's worse than a group X Factor rendition of a Lady Gaga song?
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This song choice is a lot better for them. James Graham is sick and is struggling with the high notes, but otherwise no major problems.
Mel B: That was a great song choice and you did a good job! I want to hear you sing acappella! Louis: Cheryl, that was a bit harsh on the boys!
She is also ill this week. No massive rearrangement here, but Lola delivers unique phrasing. She is still dealing with nerves, but I think she is getting better.
Louis: Lola, after that performance, you are definitely a dark horse in this competition! Mel B: You went from a fishmonger to a legend!
Simon: You are getting better and better, you could be a dark horse in this competition! Cheryl: You sounded like an angel.
He has one backing vocalist on stage and that guy sounds better than Jake. This song is too big for him and he looks out of his depth. The backing track is drowning him out.
Louis: A brave song choice, you absolutely made it your own! Simon: You give it your all, but the vocals were terrible. Mel B: No, whatever you two.
You really stepped up to a plate this week! You vocals were on point! Chloe sounds very confident in her VT. She is again styled as a lounge singer.
The stage and the background look like something out of that recent Great Gatsby movie. Chloe sounds best when she sings in a jazzy style.
She get a confetti shower during the song and has to take some papers out of her mouth at the end of her performance. Mel B: I think Cheryl did you a dis-service tonight.
Cheryl: I thought it was absolutely fantastic we wanted to hold it back a bit so finding you an Eighties sound in your style.
Paul starts the song with only the piano … Yep, this re-arrangement is definitely going to work out well. I think Paul nailed this song and pulled everything he could out of it.
Louis: This is my favorite performance of the series so far! Cheryl: This took me back to my childhood, thank you. Simon: I feel slightly uncomfortable when I see you perform, you need more confidence.
You sang it brilliantly, with my record label hat I think you need to learn how to perform better Mel B: This is a singing competition and boy you can sing!
So, we are getting rick rolled. Stevie does his best Rick Astley impersonation. He has half a dozen sexy female dancers on stage and a red carpet.
This performance is a highlight by default, I guess? Louis: You are living the dream, but it was a bit like leaving in a really bad dream and karaoke!
Cheryl: You are one of the most genuine contestants ever. That girl made you a bit nervous … Simon: Stevi, I like you.
And the public likes you. Louis changed it from some other song. The arrangement has some country elements. I have absolutely luvd it!!
Rebecca is the only one that did it for me tonight. TreyC can sing but theres nothing interesting about her voice, its almost the kind of voice that belongs in a group or a backing singer.
Aiden Scares me, I think he may be capable of killing someone. Mary killed it for me…just amazing.. Old school rhythm and blues does not seem to be compatible with her capabilities.
How far can she go in a singing contest? Well, that remains to be seen but she certainly, in my opinion holding her own.
Katie deserves to be there as does cher. Also that TreyC has a record deal and should be kicked her as shes broken the rules!!
No one is perfect, Everybody needs a second chance. And the less said about cher the better im sorry but that was borderline criiiiinge!!
Respect Katie cause she stepped up her game. Paige still needs to work on his breathing and watch out fo when his doing them runs cause he can get a little crazy and carried away plus his styling is whack, stop with the crazy jackets please.
Cher, from day one not impressed. Diva fever and Wagna the novelty acts need I say anymore. I still One Direction and Aiden.
TreyC and Rebecca has good vocal performances. I think Danni made a good point. She said to John that without all the performances, outfits and extras, with the lights down and you were just singing you can sing.
I think thats the deal for me. An outfit can be nice, a hair colour. The comment about Gamu is stupid, how can you judge on what you dont know?
While Katy is wondering why she bothered, a man in a tiger suit sings 'The Tiger Song'. Louis is his only fan. Simon thinks the vocals were "terrible", Louis says yes, as does Cheryl.
So it comes down to Katy, who decides to put Stephen through on the basis of him unveiling his pecs.
Sugar Bullet , a five-piece girl group, disappoints Simon - the other judges, however, put them through. Waitress Sabdh O'Donnell follows, to Simon's exhaustion, but again, the other judges say yes.
Rebecca Creighton helps lighten the mood, with the day's first full marks. Mary Byrne , a middle-aged supermarket checkout woman, astounds the judges and receives a standing ovation from the audience with a rendition of Tom Jones's 'I Who Have Nothing'.
Cheryl reveals that Mary's performance has been her personal favourite of the auditions so far, and Simon agrees. It was low self-esteem which kept her from realising her dream, she tells Katy - and Mary receives another standing ovation as Simon gives her 2, yeses.
Katy says goodbye as the London auditions begin with only three judges. Matt Cardle from Essex is down on his luck, in a job which he feels doesn't suit him.
After his rendition of Amy Winehouse's 'You Know I'm No Good', Louis is full of praise for the year-old painter and decorator, branding him "quirky" and "unusual".
Matt gets four yes votes and is through to Boot Camp.